EDNOS feelings

Fuck yes.

1. one day you’re eating 200 calories, and the next day you hit 2000 or more.

2. you feel like you don’t have a “real eating disorder.”

3. you try and tell people about your tortured food feelings, and they look at your healthy BMI and say: “mmm…yeah..well it can’t be that bad can it?”

4. you go through a lot of crap, and still end up the same weight that you were two years ago. (Which, of course, looks healthy and normal).

5. all this agony and you don’t get any validation from it — there’s nothing to SHOW what you’re going through; you don’t even get to be “thin.” 

6. you’re an exercise freak but don’t get to see the benefits, because you’re a binger too. And, all those hours feel like a waste sometimes because you don’t have the beautiful body you ought to have.

7. you read these threads on the anorexia and bulimia boards and agree with everything, but still feel like you don’t fit there.

8. on a good day you go out to eat, and are instantly triggered by the girl that orders a side salad with dressing on the side.

9. you hate that no one notices all the shit you go through in your head because your weight hasn’t fluctuated enough to gain attention.

10. you can loose 10 pounds in 2 weeks …. then gain back 12 in a week.

11. one day you fast, and the next day you’re eating a weeks worth of food …. then comes the choice to purge or not to purge. On good days you do, and on bad days you eat more and crawl into bed. 

12. you still control the bad food you eat - blotting the grease off pizza, drink diet coke with a “fatty” meal, have low calorie dressing on a fatty sandwich, etc.

13. when you’re really upset and can’t decide whether to restrict or binge.

14. you start every day with the intention of restricting your calories, have nothing until lunch, and then still fit in 2000 calories before bed. 

15. you’re embarrased to tell people that you have an ED cause you’re at a “healthy” weight. 

16. you try to secretly diagnose everyone you know with an ED.

17. you feel like you’re so fucked up/incompetent/worthless that you can’t do ANYTHING right/normally — not even develop an ED.

18. after a major binge you’re scared to drink water because you’ve gained enough weight already.

19. you feel like a fraud for having nothing to show for all your suffering.

20. you keep telling yourself tomorrow is a new day, and it never is.

21. even if you do try and diet somewhat “normally,” you loose nothing because your metabolism is so screwed from years of this shit.

22. over the last 11 years you have lost a total of 100 pounds, and gained about 90.

23. you starve/restrict all week knowing full well you’re probably going to binge on the weekend.

24. you can’t decide if it’s emptiness or bingeing that you crave the most.

25. you can’t sleep one night because your stomach is growling, and can’t sleep the next night because you’re so pissed at yourself for bingeing.

Melancholy Perfect

Vi gjorde ett test i skolan idag för att se vilken personlighet man har, jag blev melancholy perfect.

Det stämmer verkligen in, ska visa. Det i fetstilt passar in.

Personality Strengths of the Melancholy

  • Deep and thoughtful
  • Analytical
  • Serious and purposeful
  • Genius prone (? vet inte vad det är)
  • Talented and creative (lite kanske)
  • Artistic or musical
  • Appreciative of beauty
  • Sensitive to others
  • Self-sacrificing
  • Conscientious
  • Perfectionist
  • Idealistic
  • As a parent, sets high standards and wants everything done right.
  • As a homemaker, keeps everything in order.
  • As an employee, schedule oriented and hard working.
  • A list maker and keeper.

Personality Weaknesses of the Melancholy

  • Easily offended
  • Can get too caught up in details
  • Doesn’t do well with change.
  • Struggles with insecurity
  • Tends towards depression

Of all the personality types, the Melancholy probably struggles the most with a low self image because they have set such high standards for themselves and others.

Words count with a Melancholy. Every word that comes their way will be replayed in their mind and analyzed for meaning. Their feelings are easily hurt. They have to work hard to keep from falling into a spirit of offense. It helps the Melancholy to stop and ask “did they mean to hurt my feelings?” or “could I be reading too much into what they said?” It also helps to simply echo back comments that are potentially hurtful and make sure that you haven’t interpreted them wrong. 

Those who have Melancholy people close to them should drop generalizations from their vocabulary. Words like “always” and “never” will not be appreciated. If at all possible, drop the volume of your voice and keep your tone friendly. If you are in a bad mood, take care that you do not drip your negativity on them, they will take it personal and be wondering all day what they did wrong.

A Melancholy can become easily isolated. It’s a good thing to keep in touch and give them a lot of positive feedback and personal affirmation.

Melancholy’s think all the time. When they get quiet, watch out… Don’t be afraid to ask them if everything is alright. Depending on where they are on the road to spiritual maturity, they may not tell you what is really wrong, but be persistent. If you get the feeling that they have been offended by something that you said, just say so. “Did I hurt you when I said…”

The Melancholy is usually an amazing exhorter. When they do give you complements, they mean it. They are also often prayer warriors when they turn their thoughts into prayers for the people around them. They are merciful and sensitive to others, making great confidants and counselors.

All infon är Härifrån. Bild från tumblr.

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